Yawn, yawn

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With much flair and flourish, the Antigua Barbuda Labour Party (ABLP) recently released its slate of candidates to contest the next general election. Hear ye! Hear ye! Blah, blah, blah! The only problem was that nobody was paying attention. The grand announcement passed with barely a whimper, and the expected excitement and hullabaloo that was expected to surround the candidates, turned into a snoozefest.

Seems, Antiguans and Barbudans have tuned-out this underperforming administration and the candidacies of the incumbents. Seems, the good citizens of Antigua and Barbuda have more pressing matters on their minds. For example, they are increasingly frustrated at the fact that the hapless incumbency cannot seem to get a handle on the vexing water situation, never mind the recent grand opening of another reverse osmosis plant, and the specious promise from the washed-up head of the Antigua Public Utilities Authority (APUA), that our water situation was about to be greatly improved. Precious few citizens set any store by anything that this political dinosaur has to say.

Of course, another vexing problem occupying our thoughts is the clear and present danger posed by the fact that this supposedly advanced country of ours, has only one working fire tender, and that fire tender is barely limping along.  This writer observed it struggling to go up Briggins Road this past Saturday, on its way to a fire in Swetes. It had just left another fire in Point. Needless to say, by the time it got to Swetes, after much huffing and puffing, two buildings were destroyed, and a family of ten was left homeless. Such is our unhappy lot! We are living on a wing and a prayer, fervently hoping that no lives will be lost in any of the fires that may break out in the near future.

He of a high place, a man who has been spending an inordinate amount of time on social media, commenting on male anatomical issues and assorted trivialities, suddenly found religion and supposedly ordered four new fire tenders, as a matter of urgency. Oh haste their arrival! But what the hell took the administration so long? Why did it take a tragedy in Point to galvanise it into action, rousing the comrades from their slumber? Sigh! This administration, and its thoughtless, lackluster, and unimaginative way of doing things, is the epitome of a reactionary regime.

The same thoughtlessness and insensitivity is manifest in the mindless haste in which he of a high place rushed to raise the price of gasoline, making it $15.70 per gallon. Chupz! He is now promising to lower the price in a few weeks, by which time, insult would have already been added to injury – his knee would have been further implanted on our necks. WE CAN’T BREATHE! He of a high place appears amateurish – a neophyte, and almost nothing that he now says or does inspires any confidence. Nice leader!

The interesting thing is that this occupant of our high place, he of much bombast and boorishness, is aware that he has fallen out of favour with many of his erstwhile supporters. He is smart enough to know that only someone who is benefitting financially from him being in office, or an incorrigible red kool-aid drinker could tolerate his ungraciousness, his mean-spiritedness, his lack of tact and his astonishing foolhardiness. No right-thinking person could, in all seriousness, vote for this guy, not after the way that he bungles every blessed thing that he touches.  Only a dimwit could be titillated by his silly, childish ramblings. It is difficult to name any other leader so given to tomfoolery on social media, as is he of a high place.  That is, except for former US President, Donald Trump, who had a dreadful social media fetish.

Ironically, he of a high place is the bright bulb in a slate of ABLP candidates who, with the exception of Senator Gail Christian (St John’s Rural West), Senator Knacinta Nedd (Barbuda), Mr Rawdon Turner (St Peter), and Mr Colin James (All Saints East), have not distinguished themselves in any way during their eight years in office. They are all a dull and uninspiring lot; they have underwhelmed us with their mediocrity. No wonder that Antiguans and Barbudans yawned out loud when the long-awaited list of candidates was unveiled. Dean Jonas? Samantha Marshall? Charles Fernandez? Daryll Matthew? Michael Browne? Maria Browne? Lennox Weston? Melford Nicholas? Robin Yearwood? Give us a break! Talk about a nondescript and sub-par bunch. We would be doing ourselves and our blessed country a great disservice if we were to re-elect any of them for another five years.

Of course, we are not gluttons for punishment; we are not masochists, and we will do what we must on election day. Time for the entire incumbency, and the entire country of Antigua and Barbuda to be put out of our misery. Let us make the right choice, by voting for the young, charismatic, hardworking and visionary United Progressive Party.

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